This is normally referred to as empathic listening. Covey identified that in order to build deep relationships and lead with clarity, you need to first truly understand what people are both saying and feeling when in conversation. Habit 5: seek first to understand then to be understood is one of the habits developed by Stephen Covey in the book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. In this article, we will explore how you can use it in your daily life to build rapport and develop deep relationships. This is Habit 5 of Stephen CoveyвЂ™s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People and it seems easy enough to do on the surface, but for many people, it can be a difficult habit to implement. Click Here.Seek to understand, then to be understood. Join Teamwork and Leadership on Facebook. Search for the Good in Others: 3 Important Tips Judging Others Can Make You Look Stupid! Powerful Video You might also like these other related posts:

If you enjoyed this post and would like to share it with your team, colleagues or anyone else please вЂњShareвЂќ it, вЂњTweetвЂќ it, вЂњLinkedInвЂќ it, вЂњEmailвЂќ it, вЂњGoogle PlusвЂќ it, or вЂњLikeвЂќ it, by using one of the buttons below. What has been your experience as a leader with jumping to conclusions? Has someone ever misunderstood you? I would love to hear your thoughts on this by commenting below.

She laughed and then with a disgusted look on her face said, вЂњGross!вЂќД«ut how many times are things not as they appear? Seek to understand first is a good rule of thumb. You might have the same initial reaction my wife had when I shared this story with her. He asked, вЂњMaвЂ™am, why arenвЂ™t you eating?вЂќ The old lady looked up and politely said, pointing to the old man, вЂњIвЂ™m waiting on the teeth.вЂќ As the old man finished his half of the burger and fries, the old lady still had not started eating hers. The young man continued to watch the old couple feeling there was something he should be doing to help. The old man began to eat his food while his wife sat still, not eating. He offered to buy them another meal, but the old man respectfully declined saying that they were used to sharing everything. She took a sip and passed it back.ДЄ younger man at a nearby table observed this couple and begin to feel sorry for them. He sipped the drink and then passed it to his wife. He brought back to the table a hamburger, a small amount of fries and a drink.Д¬arefully he sliced the hamburger in two and then neatly divided the fries into two small piles. The little old man went up to the counter and ordered their food. One day a little old and very cute couple walked into the local fast food restaurant.

At the very least the leader that seeks to understand first puts himself or herself at a greater advantage in helping get the problem resolved if it needs to be. Many issues have a way of working themselves out without the need of the leader intervening. In many cases the wise leader that is patient and seeks to understand the problem first eventually discovers that there is very little he or she has to do to help solve it. In my years of observing leaders I have seen many of them jump to conclusions and get involved in issues way too soon. I heard a story the other day that reminded me of the need for leaders and people in general to seek to understand first before getting involved.